Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Tips on how to move on from your ex-boyfriend

By Sai

I’ve been having one of the biggest problems a single lady like me could encounter – moving on from your past guy. I have been watching Sex and the City the whole night and there was this episode about “break up rules”. I would like to call it my “moving on rules”.

I am not an expert in this part though. James was my first serious relationship and I am still a virgin in dealing with emotional problems brought by an ex-boyfriend. I know that there are lots of single ladies all over the world. There might be some who’s just like me and I want to share my “moving on methodology”.
  1. Get busy. Getting busy is one way of setting your mind to not think of your ex-boyfriend or at least think of something worthwhile. Find some work to do either at home or at the office. Try to be occupied at all cost because when you are stuck with nothing to do (believe me!) you will just think of your ex-boyfriend.
  2. Reconnect. With what I have experienced with James, he is this kind of guy who wants to build his own world around you and he expects you to do the same. It is kind of a good thing at the start but the world has other people too! You need to socialize! There are some who lost their connection with friends because of their “current” boyfriend. Now, when you get the chance to be single again RECONNECT with your old pals. Believe me this really works because this is also one way of getting busy and at the same time keeping up with what’s happening around the “REAL” world.
  3. Date. This is just plain date. I do not encourage hooking up with another guy because you want to avoid another pain, right? A casual date can help you a lot. Be cautious though. Be careful who you date and (please) do not fall in love! I am not a big fan of being a rebounder or using someone just to ease the pain you are currently feeling. It is true that life is unfair but ALWAYS be fair to yourself.
  4. Do the thing/s you like doing the best. As for me, I love shopping for makeup, makeup brushes, clothes and shoes. Shopping for me is a therapeutic act! This is a classic “moving on” act to most women. If you are a movie goer treat yourself to the latest picture at your local cinema.
  5. Travel and unwind. Travelling can give you an extra boost. It can help you reflect on things you have done in the past. Re-evaluating you as an individual and as a partner. Take this time to really think things over and you’ll be surprised of the result. I suggest travelling on places where you’ll feel close to nature. This can really help.
  6. Review what you’ve got and throw away unwanted memories. Photos, love letters, phone numbers, gifts and other stuffs that would remind you of him should go to the trash bin! This is one of the things you should not miss if you are decided to move on from the past. Your recovery period is a critical time and you don’t want to catch yourself off guard by remembering how you two cuddled and kissed. It will increase the pain.

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